False Promises and Deserted Hopes

It has been a while since I’ve written an article, and that is mainly because I’ve been really caught up with my GRE preparations. Anyway, so, today I would like to write about False Promises and Deserted Hopes’.

So I’m pretty sure you’ve all been in positions wherein you’re compelled to make a promise because you want to prove to the other person that you’re being genuine. But because you just want to prove it to the person at that instant, you don’t basically register it in your long term memory and hence tend to forget it. This is one type of a False Promise, which to be honest, most of us make. For example, you’re going on a vacation and you promise your neighbor you’d get them something as a souvenir. Now you know you wouldn’t remember, and even your neighbor knows you’re saying it just out of formality, and so they don’t pay any heed to it.

The second type is when you make a genuine heart-to-heart promise to your best friend, sibling, family member or for that matter a human being. The problem with this one is, you and the person involved,  know that you’ve made an ‘unbreakable vow’, and that you must move mountains if necessary, but you cannot under any circumstances break this promise. This is what makes it so much more deep and meaningful. This what ensures that your long term memory remembers this promise and maneuvers a way around your daily routine so that you can definitely fulfill this promise.

Now, no matter what you do, the more heart-to-heart promises you make, the more your life is going to get difficult. That is why, when you make a promise, you should weigh the pros and cons and keep in mind the emotions and sentiments that go with it.

I’m writing about this, because recently I went for dinner with two of my best friends from my school. We were a group of five boys, who were the best of friends. We had promised each other that we would meet up once a month on a Friday, and catch up. But sadly only three of us stayed true to the promise. So ,the other day, we were reminiscing about the good old days, when we were so naive that we believed we would all meet every month. And worst of all, the other two ‘friends’ constantly kept us hanging, giving us false hopes about eventually meeting us.

I haven’t ever understood people who break promises and then give false hopes, to only let us down further. I mean, grow a pair, be honest, and just admit that it’s not easy to keep up with promises. Its true folks, trust me on this, if ever you end up not living up to your promise, be brave and admit your mistake, if your relationship is strong enough, it’ll survive this minor setback. These little things are crucial to maintain a strong and steady relationship, be it with your family, friends, siblings, girlfriend/boyfriend, DOG, co-workers. Stay honest, be bold, make mistakes. You’re only human.

Yours Sincerely,

Nameless Old Monk.

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4 thoughts on “False Promises and Deserted Hopes

  1. Hahaha promises. Isn’t it fascinating how words can bind human beings together?
    It’s nothing physical at all and yet, the impact can be felt.

    “You said you’d get the report done by this morning!” Yelled a manager to his subordinate.

    Just through this example alone, we can imagine the emotions being relayed and received from both parties. We’d likely empathize with the subordinate first though.

    I’ve never pondered about this before but your post got me thinking so here’s my thoughts on why we make promises.

    As we may know by now, we human beings are social creatures. In general, we will have the tendency to want to please others and hence, we got people with the issues of not being able to say “No”.

    Sometimes, just as in your friends’ case, perhaps they truly wish to meet up but they are just HORRIBLE time managers. Or in most cases, their brains become defective when it comes to priority management.

    They wish to do this, do that and THAT- They want so many things in life but don’t have the wits to choose what they truly want or understand what’s the most important thing to them in life and hence, their inability to make the call.

    Though their hearts may be in the right place, their brain isn’t and they might not even realize it yet till someone tell them in their faces. When that happens, there should be changes towards their behavior. If there’s no change?

    It’s obvious that the relationship don’t mean as much to them as it does to you. I mean, they can’t even stay true to their words. Friends are pals for a reason and usually, it involves a level of trust. If trust can’t be maintained, the friendship will die too, much like a flower would wither or a vehicle dying out if not maintained well.

    But we must always keep this in mind: What we want in life may not be what other people want in life.

    Perhaps your 2 other friends got new aims in life now and they just don’t have the heart to say it straight to you guys because they don’t want to risk losing the friendship.

    We feel letdown when we expect something off people and they don’t deliver. When we think about it though, do we HAVE to feel letdown? If we do, the next thing to contemplate on is “WHY”?

    That’s usually the million dollar question heh. In this case of your friends, WHY do you feel letdown? Is it necessary to feel this way?

    Personally, I’ve cut off ties with certain group of people whom I’ve met because I know that they are poison to my goals. For some, I just lessen the amount of time we spend together, but we still do chat via text or meet up once in awhile. All for good reasons, of course.

    If you do feel yourself being letdown? Again, ask yourself why. In most cases, we don’t have to feel letdown but only feel that way because of expectations 😉

    So promises? We use them like a “Loan” of smiles. To bring a smile to someone’s face before we actually give them the actual payout of “Action” to make them feel truly happy. One way to look at it I guess haha!

    Your pal,
    Benjamin
    http://www.projectbiy.com

    Like

    1. Woah! You know you’ve actually added so many dimensions to this topic? Its insane! I couldn’t agree more. Expectations are the route cause of disappointments. Thank you so much for the feedback. I shall definitely keep these things in mind in the future! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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